Everyone can get so selfish as adults. It's rather distrubing, because I'm seeing it at a rather alarming rate. What happened to caring and sharing? Did everyone forget about these principles taught waaaaay back in primary school?
Geez it's really a dog eat dog world.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Slippin' and Slidin'
I find that some days are harder than others in life. Today is one of those days. I feel like a rag doll that has thrown herself on the floor and can't move. My refusal of life is just too much sometimes. I wish I understood why I shut down sometimes. I need a little bit of happy in my juice every morning to keep me going. I guess I will chalk it up to some winter blues perhaps.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Winter Bites ::Chomp::
Winter is so depressing. I mean it's cold and people never really want to go out and do things. Money's tighter due to X-mas shopping (which I did not do). People also tend to put on a few pounds. And let's face is snow sucks.
However, I'm making the most of my winter. Instead of hibernating like the rest of the world, I'm trying to be more active. Honestly its a mild winter week and I'm not sick so my spirits are up. I'm thinking to myself its only 2 more months of cold temperatures and in 2 months I hope to have transformed my body somewhat. Then my birthday will be here soon. YAY! I love my birthday, I mean honestly who doesn't? Then after that the weather warms up and BAM its summertime! Let's hope this summer doesn't constantly rain or remain in the 70's. I would love a few 90 degree days to go to the beach and tan it up. Last year there were ZERO.
Ahh well, until then I will hibernate at work getting shit done, and then hibernating or rather sweating it up at the gym. I want winter to feel positive. And please can the snow just simply stay away! :-)
However, I'm making the most of my winter. Instead of hibernating like the rest of the world, I'm trying to be more active. Honestly its a mild winter week and I'm not sick so my spirits are up. I'm thinking to myself its only 2 more months of cold temperatures and in 2 months I hope to have transformed my body somewhat. Then my birthday will be here soon. YAY! I love my birthday, I mean honestly who doesn't? Then after that the weather warms up and BAM its summertime! Let's hope this summer doesn't constantly rain or remain in the 70's. I would love a few 90 degree days to go to the beach and tan it up. Last year there were ZERO.
Ahh well, until then I will hibernate at work getting shit done, and then hibernating or rather sweating it up at the gym. I want winter to feel positive. And please can the snow just simply stay away! :-)
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
350
That's the amount of calories I burned today at the gym. I think to myself, holy crap that's a lot and I wonder will I be able to do more one day? I'd like to think I can become a Gym Rat and be that girl who can do the eliptical for 60 mins and break into a full nasty sweaty. I guess it will all take time. I'm sitting here watching The Biggest Loser thinking I hope to make a transformation like they are come this summer. Well That's all I have for now, I'm pretty pooped. Until tomorrow....5am? Let's hope!
Monday, January 18, 2010
Early Spring Cleaning
I've been feeling bummed these past few days and I wasn't sure why. This overwhelming sense of pure laziness just hits me once in a while but no thats not really it. Sure I was a bit lazy but nothing too extreme. I've been saying for MONTHS that I want to throw shit out the window, figuratively of course as I can't throw anything out these windows. And well today I went into a cleaning frenzy after watching the show Hoarders. Gosh those people live in filth. They NEVER throw anything away, I mean not even the garbage. At least I do that. But alas I came to the realization that YES i do hold on to crap that's unnecessary. So I started with the bathroom, then the kitchen/livingroom and finally my bedroom. A big thing I did was not only clean but FINALLY got rid of 4 garbage bags filled with clothes, shoes and purses. Mostly old stuff that I didn't want or didn't fit properly. I donated them in a drop box, couldn't find one in Maspeth so John drove me out to Bellerose. Ahh my apartment feels so clean. except I have to now get rid of "random junk" and papers (shred those). But I can tackle that next weekend, for now I did enough to feel really cleansed.I mean I even did some laundry (which I loathe). But hey stuffs got to get done.
I think it was good to clean up a lot because now after being sick so much I feel completely rejuvenated and ready to step forward. Back to 5am routines perhaps? If not at least I will be hitting the gym after work. My co-worker said he will come with me, but he does weights and I do cardio, its all good though you know everybody's gotta do their own thing. Anywho its getting late and I should be in bed. Until next time....
I think it was good to clean up a lot because now after being sick so much I feel completely rejuvenated and ready to step forward. Back to 5am routines perhaps? If not at least I will be hitting the gym after work. My co-worker said he will come with me, but he does weights and I do cardio, its all good though you know everybody's gotta do their own thing. Anywho its getting late and I should be in bed. Until next time....
Sunday, January 17, 2010
It's been 5 years...
I'm baaaaaack! Well hello there, it's been quite a while. I must say I've missed blogging. I never really stopped writing I just haven't really done it one here. 3 things lead me back to my good ol' blog here. One was since I cancelled my Myspace account 6 months ago it left a void, while Facebook has a notes section its not really quite a "blog. Two would be Rikki and I discussing when we used to blog here 5 years ago at Kenny's birthday party. Three would be Cindy starting her blog on this site. After that I knew I HAD to start again. So well here I am! A lot has changed but some things well always stay the same.
I find that the last time I blogged on here was at the end of a great summer where I had ultimately set a goal of losing weight. I did achieve my goal. I had lost 30 pounds from May-August of 2005. I had felt so great. So many wonderful things had changed for me when I had done that. But now I sit here 5 years later back at square one plus 10 pounds. I recently decided on Thanksgiving of 2009 that I needed to change that. I weighed in at 216 pounds. 20 pounds more than I weighed back in May 2005 which I thought at the time was the HUGEST I would ever let myself become. Well obviously I was wrong. I did maintain that first weight loss in 2005 for about a year and a half before I started to gain weight again. But my weight Really started to explode around 2008. When I lost all the weight I was 165 my September 2005, I weighed in at around 175 in November 2007 jumping to 195 in September 2008 to 216 by November 2009. So 2 years 40 pounds. What caused it? STRESS. Career stress, relationship stress and pure refusal to do anything in life becuase I felt so beaten down. I was severely depressed over so many mnay things. It really started to obviously show. But I did'nt see it. It honestly took a one person to really sink into my head that I was fat. I hated what he said at the time but it was the damn truth. Another friend pissed me off by saying that I was doing nothing about my weight while we were hooking up. I'm thinking to myself SERIOUSLY? What an asshole. It bothered me and bothered me for months in my head. And in turn they were both right, I was fat and wasn't doing anything about it.
Well I decided to do something. I lost 10 pounds since Thanksgiving. Over the holidays though I gave into temptation. While I didn't gain much back thankfully I was at a plateau and then I had gotten sick twice badly. I lost my focus for about 3 weeks, which sucked becuase in that time more weight coulda been lost. I think my extreme routine maybe broke my body down, I shocked it, which I wanted too but it was a lot of stress. I think my body is at a more stable position and ready to conquer the goals I set.
I'm not going to turn this blog into my journey of weightloss. It's going to be my outlet of my life struggles. I just wanted to outline a big struggle that even after 5 years I am still dealing with. I hope that maybe I can help inspire one person besides myself that will reach their goals. Its a long road but trust me in a snap of two fingers life just flys on by.
I find that the last time I blogged on here was at the end of a great summer where I had ultimately set a goal of losing weight. I did achieve my goal. I had lost 30 pounds from May-August of 2005. I had felt so great. So many wonderful things had changed for me when I had done that. But now I sit here 5 years later back at square one plus 10 pounds. I recently decided on Thanksgiving of 2009 that I needed to change that. I weighed in at 216 pounds. 20 pounds more than I weighed back in May 2005 which I thought at the time was the HUGEST I would ever let myself become. Well obviously I was wrong. I did maintain that first weight loss in 2005 for about a year and a half before I started to gain weight again. But my weight Really started to explode around 2008. When I lost all the weight I was 165 my September 2005, I weighed in at around 175 in November 2007 jumping to 195 in September 2008 to 216 by November 2009. So 2 years 40 pounds. What caused it? STRESS. Career stress, relationship stress and pure refusal to do anything in life becuase I felt so beaten down. I was severely depressed over so many mnay things. It really started to obviously show. But I did'nt see it. It honestly took a one person to really sink into my head that I was fat. I hated what he said at the time but it was the damn truth. Another friend pissed me off by saying that I was doing nothing about my weight while we were hooking up. I'm thinking to myself SERIOUSLY? What an asshole. It bothered me and bothered me for months in my head. And in turn they were both right, I was fat and wasn't doing anything about it.
Well I decided to do something. I lost 10 pounds since Thanksgiving. Over the holidays though I gave into temptation. While I didn't gain much back thankfully I was at a plateau and then I had gotten sick twice badly. I lost my focus for about 3 weeks, which sucked becuase in that time more weight coulda been lost. I think my extreme routine maybe broke my body down, I shocked it, which I wanted too but it was a lot of stress. I think my body is at a more stable position and ready to conquer the goals I set.
I'm not going to turn this blog into my journey of weightloss. It's going to be my outlet of my life struggles. I just wanted to outline a big struggle that even after 5 years I am still dealing with. I hope that maybe I can help inspire one person besides myself that will reach their goals. Its a long road but trust me in a snap of two fingers life just flys on by.
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